Twas the Saturday before Christmas and all through Corktown, not a person was sleeping, the party was on.
It’s time to deck the halls and drink as much eggnog as you can. Santas from all over the Metro-Detroit area are making their lists and checking them twice to make sure that the naughtiest elves are coming to the 16th Annual Detroit Santarchy Pub Crawl on Saturday, December 19, 2015.
Okay, I’m going to keep this short, because if this is the first you’re hearing of Santarchy, you have a lot of work to do before the insanity begins at 7 pm tomorrow night.
Last year, over 2,000 drunk Santa Clauses, Mrs. Clauses, Elves, Christmas trees, reindeer, candy canes, and like three lame-os wearing an ugly sweater and a Santa hat flew in on their sleighs to Detroit to stumble between thirteen different bars and partake in some holly jolly drunkenness. Many of the bars had Santarchy-specific specials, and all of them had live music or DJs keeping the party rockin’ around the Christmas Tree all the way until final call.
So here’s what you need to know about this holiday-themed bacchanal:
- Driving your sleigh drunk is a huge no-no. So you can go to any one of the designated bus pick-ups around the Metro-Detroit area. There, you can buy a bus pass for $20 a person and get a little pregame going. You can find the list of bus pick-ups on the Santarchy 2015 Facebook Event page.
- The buses will take partying Santas to Corktown’s Gaelic League where the party really kicks off. There, you can buy Santarchy swag, grab your first (official) drink of the night, meet up with Santas from other areas, and strategize a game plan for the night.
- At 8pm, the buses that brought the Santas from the ‘burbs will start circulating between the participating bars.
- For those who live near the area or don’t need to ride in on the busses, you still have to buy the passes to be shuttled from bar to bar. You can buy those at the Gaelic League starting at 7 pm.
- For those who are planning to Uber it up, Uber has paired up with Santarchy to bring us $20 off with the code “Santarchy2015”. New riders only, I’m afraid.
- Costumes are mandatory. Don’t be that guy who shows up trying to get away with an ugly sweater and a Santa hat. You will be mocked mercilessly and not allowed. As the head Santas say, we all need to “Santa the f— up!”
- At the end of the night, everyone will meet back at the Gaelic League to hop on the buses that will return them from whence they came, so remember what bus number you came down on… or have a friend sharpie it to your forehead or something.
Now go! Run. Do not walk to your nearest Party City (or similar store) and pick up a Santa costume, because this is one Christmas party you do not want to miss!
Tis the season to get tipsy! Fa la la la lah, la SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS!! (everybody!!!)
And from all of us at Hell Yeah Detroit, have a safe and happy holiday season!
Santarchy Website: DetroitSantarchy.net
Facebook event: Detroit Santarchy 2015